broken promises

This is just something I wrote, feeling a lil down and sitting by the fire place...

(Also, not true, before you remark)

I broke every promise to you,

callously so.

There was no intent to place harm on your senses, still I provided with no less than false hope;

subsequent miscarriages of the heart.

I bruised your soul quite effortlessly within my strong grip

You could expect no less could you?

*

You believe yourself to be the the best...

So far from the truth was this.

Quietly, I learned your ways...How you underestimated my capabilities.

With clearity and the truth of it, I moved on.

*

My words hold no value.

Truth? I could've easily loved you. To do so however, I'd have to own the better part of valor.

Still do you deny the lust burning between us?

You'd have me believe that I am indistinguishable amongst men.

We know better than this, don't we?

I'm the man that you reach for in the night...I bring you both pleasure and pain. I provide you with fulfillment all the while with holding emotion.

*

I've tears spent. Questioned your motives a million times over.

Burdened with the sorrow I accutely felt the distance placed between us.

But I grew stronger. I silently rallied against the broken promises spoken in the dark. Your touch left me feeling empty...No, you'd never suffice.

Your inaction never went unnoticed. I wasn't left with want.

Neglect, inconsistancy brought me to illumination.

*

I'm the drug that you seemingly cannot resist, relinquish.

Darlin' I understand that you desire so much more...

You don't hear my omissions, you turn a deaf ear to words never spoken...

*

When I discovered him, thoughts of you rapidly escaped me...dissipating...

You've been left behind as a lesson learned, so hold no concern for me.

Tell your lies to another, for you will be lied to, assuredly.

You were a grand teacher, I the consumate student.

True lust burst you forth into my world, but it is love which displaces you now.

*

I wish you'd wise up, leave me for the better that awaits you.

I'm not going to change.

Truth? Change does exsist beyond what we coveted...here

You have to care enough to realize how little I care.

Til then, I'll look into your precious eyes and tell my lies.

I'll break every promise spoken to you.

*

Tonight was the last.

I cast a smile in your direction, knowing full well that I'm worth far more than your broken promises.

I loved you, but no longer.

I promised that I would never hurt you, perhaps that is the reason I neglected to speak of my love for him..."the other"

*

I left before the light of morning broke through the windows' pane, realizing that it was an eventuality that I'd return.

Like a child to a father...she'd forgive...

*

I waited for his departure.

Showered. Cleansing myself, ridding my body of his empty touch, leaving the memory of him far, far behind.

As father to child, my love awaited my arrival.

I forgave my lover, subsequentlty forgetting him altogether.

Love seemingly over shadows broken promises...

*

Well that was just a thought, hope you enjoyed the lil note a jotted down.

I'm thinking that I'll place this in "Logan Falling" let me know what you think!

From my hand to yours,

Sawyer

Saint Andrews

hard goodbyes...

Well it was a very emotional, difficult 9 days in the hospital with my mother, but she made it through.

I wanted to take the time to thank everyone who offered their prayers and support to our whole family.

It was wonderful to see my sister and my brother, who were both exceptional towards me and my family!

The moments where we almost lost her was unbelievably hard, but saying goodbye at the airport was a tear jerker. While you wish her off to a better place, you also realize that you may not ever see her again.

You contemplate; did I say all that I should? Did I remember to tell her what a great mom she's been to me?

Did I remember to thank her for all that she did for me? For my family?

I'd like to think so!

One of the truly great gifts I found in all of this was the generousity of the care givers, docs, nurses etc. and of course my siblings support.

My brother gave me something of my fathers, who had passed away 5 years ago. It was an incredible gesture on his part.

So I am still working on the Tagon series...

here is a lil more of his journal. I hope that you are enjoying this as much as I am...

Tagon

March third, 2010

I ran the woods again...food is easily found. It's become rather trivial to me as of late.

I've often wondered how the others have fared, as I've not bore witness to their kind since the Queen came to me and offered me this thing I lovingly refer to as immortailty...

She was of great interest to me, this Sawyer.

I've no idea why she chose me. Perhaps the darker side of her knew a kinship?

Well she left as quickly as she came onto Gevaudan. Maybe this is a good thing yes?

She was quite formidable...

And so today, I long for a mate. Short of changing another, I've no real way of going about it...

That might have been a question posed to her eh?

Ah I don't know, I see women from time to time and I hunger...this woman that I've recently met, well let's just say that my hunger has moved on to pure lust...

True, I saved her life, and at the time it mattered naught to me. But now? Well...I wonder if I shouldn't collect on that particular debt.

I'm sure she'd be willing enough. But to care for another whilst my heart is so deeply blackened? Would it be fair to her? Could I actually love again?

After losing my wife (saphian) I held out little hope for such.

I am hunting later in this day, going to bring her along, teach her some of our ways.

She holds onto this insatiable need to realize all that is me. It is a deadly propostion of this I am considerably certain of. How do I run with her and not kill her in the meantime?

Well I write, in this Sawyer and I am common. I will keep you posted on all that is werewolf as we begin to know one another, that or you will surely recall my life based on what you read upon my demise.

Let us hope that that is not the case. I do not plan on the faulter, I plan to survive the peasants as they would say in novels.

Pitch forks and the like are simply put, not my style. I made a deal with the darkness, suffice to speak that I will see it through.

Until the next we meet,

I am Tagon.

____________________________________________________-

So sorry to make this brief, but I've not much time, must return to my writing!

enjoy your week, live your time well!

From my hand to yours,

Sawyer

Saint Andrews